[546] Two sides October 30th, 2007 – 1:12pm Posted in Good Things, Thoughts No comments

http://taoyue.com/stacks/articles/brilliant-men.html

This sorry tale singularly epitomises everything my nature rejects about life, and yet features the most apt sentence to describe what I’m like in the history of everything ever:

“Their active minds can always see two sides to every question; and they stand still while the debate goes on inside.”

I’m getting a tattoo on Saturday with John; I might work that into it somehow.

[545] Amazing Spider-Man 35 October 24th, 2007 – 1:09am Posted in Comics No comments

“I wonder when I wrote that…?”

“…must have been a lifetime ago.”

Amazing Spider-Man 35: let’s just hope an emo band never use this for inspiration.

Or to translate that into Smiths: “the passing of time leaves empty minds waiting to be filled.”

This is funny timing for me as I’ve had to think about loss again recently, even though the final stages of the process were signed for many months ago. Time’s a remarkable thing in that it can make even a complete loss a palatable thought after it’s had long enough to work its magic; I don’t know of any other medicine like that. At Jill’s wedding – photos on Facebook – I caught up with my great-aunt whose husband died years ago, and we were able to talk about him freely; my own losses follow her respective lines and certainly I know how Spidey can throw that photo …read more.

[543] You daft moaning cock October 19th, 2007 – 7:03pm Posted in Events 2 comments

So… I’ve laid off the beer, gotten over my cold and risen from that pit I was in last weekend. It’s always easy once you’re out of the stupor to laugh at yourself, roll your eyes and wonder how you could be so juvenile. That, though, forgets the blinding all-encompassing ache of it while it’s happening, and to forget that would surely just make it a fresh new painful experience next time it happens? Nah, the lesson I learn from this is that it’s just a case of riding it out, or as Leigh put it taking the black dog for a walk, because I know by now that I’m not always like that and just a few days or weeks later I can be like the normal me again. It’ll rear its head again, for sure, but the more it happens the more I get used to it.

This weekend …read more.

[541] Overload October 13th, 2007 – 11:54pm Posted in Bad Things No comments

Emotive music is a strange thing; its ability to turn the most stoic man into gushing jelly is pretty bewildering. I’m no exception. Life and feeling passes me by until the middle six of a song clicks in my head, a memory floods back to me and for all I’m worth, karaoke plays. (A nod there to Maximo Park, certainly one of my Earthly pleasures.) Life’s been overloading me of late and I need a break, desperately. I put my trust in… well, chance, I guess.

[540] I tell you what October 13th, 2007 – 10:48pm Posted in Bad Things, Thoughts 4 comments

I really do.

You don’t know how fucking… sandblasted I am.

It’s all I can do to say, that 1963-94 by New Order remains one of those few songs that can lift me momentarily from this hell; a brief pick me up, each chord a sling round the shoulder. I swear, beyond this song, I’m fucked, amateur prose only a brief respite from the words cannoning around my head. Do you know the ultimate problem? It’s that I see through every moment of life before it’s even happened. Nothing surprises me. Do you know how boring that makes every moment of life? Fuck me, it’s dull. I just collapse when I see other people being pleased by simple things; I haven’t been pleased by anything for twenty years.

I’m a miserable fuck, I know that. I can’t help it. Sooner or later I’ll just tap out and finish the game, because I’m not …read more.

[539] Amazing Spider-Man 29 October 8th, 2007 – 10:42pm Posted in Comics 3 comments

Check out the colours on this!

Apparently this is down to Andy Yanchus. There isn’t much about him online so I’m not too informed about him, but this is the first issue I’ve seen that looks like this – and I’ve got to say, it’s damn nice.

[537] Enjoy the silence October 6th, 2007 – 1:56am Posted in Events No comments

These types of websites aren’t useless; they’re cathartic. It’s an extension of Victorian, medieval, pre-historic expression – a public release of inner feeling. That’s cathartic, which is a human feeling, nothing to be ashamed of. I think it’s been sullied recently by teenage angst but behind that, there’s an infinitely fascinating insight into how people think and feel. These days, you don’t have to be fortunate enough to be gifted with wordsmithery and a publisher to be appreciated for your thoughts; if they’re evidently interesting, people worldwide will love you for it. That seems okay, to me.

I read a fair bit these days. Without a girl, or woman, to spend my time with I revert to my old habits in my free time. I still really like sitting in empty pubs in the afternoon with a new newspaper and a pint. I know this site has been called “Empty bars…” …read more.

[536] What do you have to lose? October 4th, 2007 – 2:43pm Posted in Thoughts 4 comments

“What do you have to lose?” is one of those justifications for advice that you hear wheeled out over and over again. It’s quite a crafty mechanism really because it transfers attention in the conversation from the actual words that have been said, over to the person who’s considering it; they become distracted by their own ego reminding them they should be bold and brave and lose sight of the actual meaning of what’s been suggested. It’s a very hit and miss qualification, too, being a very valid point for some people and utterly missing the point for others. The tough-skinned among us can take defeat or rejection with good grace and move on to the next challenge; the weaker souls among us just instantly remember “oh, there’s so much to lose…” That makes it one I try to remember not to use, although in the flow of conversation when …read more.

[534] Mighty inventions October 2nd, 2007 – 12:02pm Posted in Geek 1 comment

My job occasionally requires me to use VNC, today being a case in example, and it reminded me of my all-time top three inventions:

The magnetic screwdriver.
VNC.
VLC media player.

Any challengers to that list?